We have just returned from a fabulous day at Queen Victoria's summer retreat where we explored the art collections and exquisite furniture in the main house, walked to the private beach, played and dressed up in Swiss Cottage and finally were interviewed by Mrs Pilkington, the Housekeeper, for positions in service below stairs serving the senior servants.
On entering Osborne House our children were bemused and a little embarrassed by the many statues in the Greek and Roman classical style. English Heritage staff tried to explain Victorian taste in art and culture but the children remained unconvinced and many stared at their feet to avoid seeing the nude forms! "They were so rude!" says Keira, obviously still traumatised! Downstairs, in the Table-Deckers' Room, Joseph W was very excited at the prospect of a six-course meal but less impressed when he was told that everyone had to stop eating as soon as the Queen put her cutlery down.
Borough Green pupils are certainly a curious breed, constantly asking questions; one member of English Heritage staff asked if two of the boys in Mrs Martin's group "have an off switch" - if they do, I haven't found it!
In Swiss Cottage we dressed up and played with the Royal children's toys. We could not drag Corey away from the dressing up box and the mirror - he made a very glamorous soldier in his red military jacket. At this point we must mention Corey's new friend, Jeff - a very handsome red triceratops - who has accompanied Corey to every meal, every activity, every journey since he was purchased at Dinosaur Isle; apparently he even slept with Corey in a little den on Wednesday night.
Our last appointment of the day was below stairs where we donned aprons and cuffs for our interview with the indomitable Mrs Pilkington. The Housekeeper taught us her rules, demonstrated how to lay the table and questioned us repeatedly about good manners. Every answer had to begin, "Please, Mrs Pilkington..." and end "Mrs Pilkington". She was suitably aghast when our children answered her enquiry about bad table manners. For example, Lucy said, "Please, Mrs Pilkington, flicking your food would be bad manners, Mrs Pilkington." and someone else was brave enough (or silly enough!) to add, "Please, Mrs Pilkington, burping at the table would be bad manners, Mrs Pilkington". She looked rather shocked; I doubt that particular child will be offered the position! Sam ably demonstrated how to lay a table correctly with sufficient cutlery and carefully measured gaps between plates and knives and forks - I'm sure Vick family meals will become very posh affairs now that Sam has completed his training, he ven knows how to correctly use a soup spoon! Very few of your children decided to embark on careers in service after experiencing this formidable lady's exacting standards.
We are now back at Winchester House getting ready for the disco: the hair straighteners are working hard, party shoes are promenading up and down the girls' corridor and some very stylish outfits have been glimpsed as the bedroom doors are flung open and young ladies flit in and out. The boys, of course, needed very little time to get ready so are in the Games Room with a few of our girls who quite sensibly questioned the need for an hour and a half to change outfits!
